my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
