singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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