we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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