she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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