I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She's not a foreskin expert like you
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Damn victory sex feels great
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
