Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
