Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
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You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
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nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
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