Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
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:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
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I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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