I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
