break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
