Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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