Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
