I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
