I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize