it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
