I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
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The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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