Why are handjobs necessary in class?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize