your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
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