Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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