i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize