He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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