Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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