her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
