I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Holy sore nipples Batman
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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