You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
