There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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