That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize