Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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