You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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