So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
