you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
