After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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