Plan B is the new Plan A
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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