every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She's the barista slut.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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