It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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