Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize