Those balls look pretty dangerous.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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