I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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