once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize