i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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