Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize