ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
