i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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