I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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