I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
That accounts for only three of the penises
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Randomize
