he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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