I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
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