literally had 100 drinks last night.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
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