Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
