i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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