conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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