Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
