Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I party with great urgency now.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
