Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
