yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
